Faceless Holes
Does anyone know why in The
Man Without a Face Mel Gibson makes Nick Stahl (Terminator 3: Rise of the Machines) dig square and triangular holes
as part of the tutoring? I mean I know
Gibson’s trying to teach about calculating volumes ‘n shit but the holes don’t
come back around later like Mr. Miyagi in The
Karate Kid showing Daniel he had been learning martial arts all along with
the various assigned chores. There isn’t
a lightbulb moment where Stahl realizes the digging and filling in of the holes
was actually time well spent because he learned a lesson. We don’t even know if he correctly dug them
to Gibson’s requested specifications. So
this kinda just comes off like child manual labor to me.
Crossdressing Commander Krill
Commander Krill (Gary Busey) definitely did not need to
dress up as a woman during the captain’s party in Under Siege. He wasn’t
trying to go incognito and sneak past people or fool folks into thinking it
wasn’t him. By the time he gets to the
captain’s quarters his wig is off so the silly time is over quickly. It wasn’t misdirection either because we
don’t see anyone smuggle anything past the officers at the party. And if you say Krill needed the wig to
conceal the gun he used to kill the captain with I don’t buy it. He could’ve put anything over the gun to hide
it like a jacket or a hat. Did Krill
dress up for shock value to temporarily distract the captain before murdering
him? That also doesn’t make sense
because Krill doesn’t shoot the captain immediately. He takes the time to deliver one last line
before the assassination. Plus it isn’t
setup that the captain is always armed and ready for an attack. So then what was the point of Krill cross
dressing? If you take it out of the
movie nothing changes. I guess it was
purely to have some fun with the audience?
Useless Margo
Along the same lines as the previous section in Big Trouble in Little China Margo (Kate
Burton (127 Hours)) is a completely
unnecessary character. She doesn’t help
in any way by possessing unique knowledge, fighting off bad guys or doing any
other goddamn thing at any goddamn time. At some point the filmmakers must’ve realized
this plus the fact that they already had two damsels in distress (Miao Yin and
Gracie Law) because they sideline her ass for the third act. I can’t believe it took me this long to see
how much of a useless character she is.
If you took her out nothing would change.
Faceless Henchmen
Faceless henchmen have always been around. You can go back to the stormtroopers in Star Wars or the king’s forces in The Adventures of Robin Hood to find a
boatload of baddies being killed like it’s the easiest thing in the world. They’re setup for us to believe that their
lives aren’t worth a damn, or that they’re not even real people.
Things changed in the 80’s and 90’s though where we actually
got to know our main villain’s henchmen.
Maybe we couldn’t tell you all their names but we would recognize their
faces and they may have even had a few lines of dialogue. Think back to Die Hard, Out for Justice and Robocop,
we know these henchmen. Of course not
every movie made during that time was like that. Commando,
The Matrix, Cobra and True Lies
all feature faceless henchmen, generic men that only show up on screen to get
mowed down in an instant.
My recent viewings of Logan
and John Wick: Chapter 2 got me
thinking about the whole faceless henchmen thing because both have them. And I realized I generally prefer to get
acquainted with a bad guy’s crew. It
might seem insignificant but that extra touch can go a long way. It should get you more invested in the story
and characters which is nice. So I say
give these henchmen faces and personalities.
They’re out there dying for us.
It’s the least we can do.
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