There are a bunch of things in this movie that we still find
in big action films today. You have the
world domination premise, a large group of people being held hostage, military
might and way too many characters crammed into one installment. Even the fictional country/city setting and Bison’s
superhuman powers at the end are typical of modern times.
Ok, there are key differences though like the lighter tone
and overall casting choices. This movie
also has a lot of gunplay which has diminished (or morphed into
laser/superpower/magic blast battles) with mainly the advent of a flood of
comic book pictures. Strange, you’d
think you would want to have a lot of street fighting in, you know, your Street Fighter movie. But the filmmakers subverted expectations by
going for something different and bigger than piddly skirmishes in various
locales. That model had been done to
death by that point (and extremely well too with badass shit like Lionheart and Enter the Dragon). So I
appreciate the attempt at changing it up.
Screenwriter extraordinaire Steven E. de Souza (Die Hard, The Running Man, Ricochet,
Commando, 48 Hrs.) clearly had aspirations of diving into the world of
directing and saw this as his meal ticket.
He probably thought of this film as a way of paying his dues and getting
some experience before he could sink his teeth into something meatier. Unfortunately for de Souza the picture tanked
and he only went on to direct a handful of not well known TV shit. Street
Fighter isn’t poorly directed though.
It’s the script (also written by de Souza) and the casting that are the
real problems. Too bad Steven.
Look, this isn’t a good movie really but I had a lot of fun
checking it out this last time. Everybody
loves to crap on it but it’s far from the worst thing. It doesn’t commit the high crime of being
boring which goes a long way. There’s
usually something weird and/or semi-exciting happening. It doesn’t seem careless. It feels like they actually kinda tried and went
for something.
Anyway, in closing I argue that this picture resembles something
more of the 2010’s than it does the 90’s and that was interesting to see.
The Big Chill
Written and directed by Lawrence Kasdan (who wrote The Empire Strikes Back, Raiders of the Lost
Ark, Return of the Jedi and Body Heat),
this dramedy focuses on a group of college friends that reunite because one of
their own committed suicide. They’re all
in their thirties now and find that life is kinda depressing. Their college days were the best years of
their lives when they lived together, ate together, slept together and got
fucked up together. It’s about
discovering oneself and reconnecting with your past. And seriously guys I don’t get why this was
such a hit.
I’m pretty sure I get what the movie’s saying (your youthful
vigor eventually transforms into self-absorption which perhaps allows for
self-reflection) and what these characters are going through (a sort of early
mid-life crisis brought on by the death of one of their friends). But my big gripe is that the characters
aren’t any different at the end than they were at the beginning. There isn’t clear emotional growth. One guy possibly hints that he’s gonna scale
back on the drug usage and one of the women might have gotten knocked up. Maybe.
But that’s it.
I feel kinda gypped because of how broad the entire thing is
played and how we supposedly went on a rich emotional journey even though we
have nothing to show for it.
But how about that awesome soundtrack? Ooooo, the soundtrack. That’s the thing the film is known for,
right? Fuck the soundtrack. A lot of the time it’s distracting and feels
forced. It’s weird, the song selection
here comes across as ham fisted by obnoxiously doubling down on what the
characters are feeling, but similar selections and usage done in Dirty Dancing are genius. I think part of it is that Dirty Dancingactually goes somewhere
and the songs help to convey emotional evolution. With The
Big Chill it’s a series of scenes that could be placed in just about any
order so the songs only seem to reinforce insipidly happy or sad sentiments
without much complexity or even context.
I dunno, I’d say give this one the chilly shoulder.
White Men Can’t Jump
I genuinely can’t believe White Men Can’t Jump isn’t considered one of the best films ever
made. Every aspect is fucking
phenomenal. If you haven’t seen it it’s
about two basketball hustlers (Woody Harrelson (The People vs. Larry Flynt) and Wesley Snipes (Passenger 57)) that cross paths and out of the games they play on
each other and with each other they forge an incredible, yet fragile,
relationship. They each have their
struggles outside of their passionate athleticism and equally fervent scamming
(which for them is inseparably interconnected) that both round them out and
ground them. Without that the movie
would be too hollow, so their lives off the court are wisely focused on for
half the film. But make no mistake, basketball
is life for these guys and they’ll
always keep playing, even if it means their downfall.
Shit, I guess white men can
jump ‘cause this was written and directed by a white dude: Ron Shelton. He wrote the really fun corrupt college
basketball picture Blue Chips and
directed the underrated cop drama Dark
Blue. He also did the overrated
baseball chick flick Bull Durham but
I won’t hold that against him.
Everything from the script to the acting to the crystal
clear editing to the skillful character development to the un-fucking-believable
cinematography (so many beautiful slow motion shots of tight passing and
gorgeous uninterrupted angles of the actors sinking shots for real), this is a
masterpiece guys. And that ain’t no
hustle.
Close Range
Another solid action picture from Isaac Florentine and Scott
Adkins. This one involves Adkins
crossing the border into Mexico to rescue his niece. He kills a lot of cartel dudes in the process
and they ain’t none too pleased about that.
When Adkins delivers his niece back to his sister in Arizona they have
to defend themselves against not only the forthcoming Mexicans but a corrupt
cop who also wants them dead. It’s as
simple as you can get.
Damn guys, if you’re looking for action that harkens back to
the golden 80’s/90’s era then direct to video (DTV) is still the place to
go. I have no beef with newer
theatrically released action movies but generally they have their own unique
super slick style. Close Range goes back to photographing the fights in a flatter (but
not dull) manner by pulling back the camera, showing the full body in frame and
allowing the actors/stunt people do their thing. Florentine does employ some slow down and
speed up but it’s minor and not done in the extreme way like you usually see
it.
The fights themselves are all exciting and Jeremy Marinas (The Expendables, TMNT (2014), Power/Rangers (that short that turned
the Power Rangers into a very dark
and gritty concept, even though that’s not at all what the Power Rangers are)) did a great job choreographing them. The stunt guys really throw themselves into
it and Adkins never looked better. He
even battles an SUV on foot at one point, if you’re into that kinda thing.
I think my favorite fight though is the one Adkins has with the
guy who’s attempting to avenge his brother’s death from the opening of the
movie. The poor bastard exclaims “you
killed my brother!” and Adkins responds “Yea? Well I’m gonna kill you, little
bitch. Let’s go!” It blows me away that that semi-psychotic
response is uttered by the good guy!
Florentine and Adkins have worked wonders in the past with Undisputed II and III and the Ninja
movies. This is another triumphant notch
in their belts. It’s not sophisticated
in any sense of the word but that’s ok. It’s just a damn good time. I definitely recommend this one if you want a
very solid, no frills, quick 80 minute action picture.
In Terrence Malick’s latest…thing, he turns his abstract eye
on Hollywood and its hollow disposition.
A man (Christian Bale (Shaft
(2000)), movie producer I’m guessing, floats from one relationship to another
because that’s just what he does. What
is it really all about and mean? I
haven’t a fuckin’ clue. But that’s sorta
why I like Malick’s films so much. You
get whatever you want out of them. Wanna
feel enlightened, depressed, think the characters are going on an eloquent
journey, think everyone’s drifting aimlessly?
It’s all up for interpretation.
You can dig deep to figure out the meaning behind everything or you can
take what’s presented on the surface (honestly this is mostly the approach I
take) and still get something out of the experience either way.
What makes Malick’s pictures fascinating is that it’s a
total experiment. Every actor who’s
worked with him describes the shoot like nothing they’ve ever done before. It’s almost a workshop where the interaction
itself and being “in the moment” are more important than what’s on the
page. Knight of Cups went to the extreme though because there was no
script and the actors didn’t even know what the movie was about. I mean shit, this is beyond improvisation
where at least you have an idea of what you’re going for or an end goal that
you need to achieve. For this one it was
totally wide open. Really with the
exception of the narration, which you could argue is superfluous, it’s
essentially a wacky silent picture (however the score is gorgeous by the way).
It’s amazing how coherent Malick’s movies come out in
general but this one is a goddamn miracle.
His movies are ballsy as shit and it seems that his balls have only
grown bigger over the years. Each one
feels like they’re getting farther and farther from any sort of narrative and simply
becoming a series of images that loosely tie together.
In the past Malick has fetishized natural beauty with endless
pictures of grass, beaches, mountains, trees, wind, humans, etc. But with this one he finally comes around to
man-made wonders like skyscrapers, casinos, vibrant lighting, art, fountains,
mansions, etc. And since he has such a
mixture of both natural and man-made images (including many unflattering shots
of human civilization like abandoned lots and gaudy malls) I don’t get the
impression that he’s looking down on the man-made stuff. There seems to be equal amazement and even
respect at what we have created for ourselves to live and interact with.
On paper the idea for this picture sounds like it shouldn’t
work at all but for me it mostly does. I
liked it better than To the Wonder
and The Tree of Life (the outer space
shit notwithstanding (I can’t fuckin’ wait for The Voyage of Time which is supposed to be 90 mins of just
that)). This is a different beast than
those two though. I think the narrative
is more open to interpretation and there’s pretty much no skeletal structure
for “scenes” to hang on. Plus this is
one of the most visually stunning films I’ve ever seen and that plays a more
important role here because the storytelling is more optical than in previous
works.
Malick’s style of filmmaking is gonna rub a lot, and I mean
a helluva lot, of people the wrong way.
I totally get that. This is not
for everyone. Actually I don’t know who
this is supposed to be for. It truly
feels like Malick makes these movies for himself alone and if someone else
happens to dig it then it’s a happy accident.
It’s so weird because he’s like a mythical figure in the film world,
like he doesn’t even exist. You never
see him, you never hear from him. He
just makes these pieces and moves on to the next project, never paying any
mind.
But folks out there astonishingly keep giving him money to
make his pictures and huge actors clamor to work with him. It’s pretty damn strange how high profile his
shit is considering how abstruse it is.
I know I’m not alone in appreciating the man’s work but it’s very
surprising how not alone I am.
Alright, I’ll make a deal with you Terry, if you keep making
‘em I’ll keep watching ‘em.
The internet seems to love to shit on Jaws 3 and 4 (The Revenge) and I don’t really disagree
that they’re terrible films. But Jaws 2 is always skipped over for some
reason. Why? Why don’t you get senselessly angry and shit
on Jaws 2 webernet? Not good enough for ya? Fine.
I guess I’ll have to do it.
But before we dive in (ouch, that was a bad one) let’s talk
about the original a little. Back when I
started this here blob thingy a Jaws
piece was one of the first things I did.
Honestly it’s not my best effort but I did hit most of the points I
wanted to. Re-watching it again however
brought something new to light that I’d like to bring up.
The New Englanders (or “islanders” as they’re called) are
kinda portrayed as morons. First the
mayor wants to keep the beaches open and gets his crew to back him on the bogus
boating accident theory. I understand he
wants tourists to vacation there so the town can survive but he doesn’t want to
take any precautions in case Brody is right about a shark. The mayor bullies Brody to get his way. Then after the Kintner boy is gobbled up
(that’s two victims total) the townspeople are upset that the beaches will be
closed. Turns out only to be for twenty
four hours but still, these folks look callous in the wake of recent events. When a large shark is caught after the $3,000
reward is posted the mayor won’t listen to the shark expert, Hooper, to perform
an autopsy to confirm that it’s the killer they’ve been looking for (and it’s
not). If this wasn’t bad enough look at
the three guys who finally take Jaws down.
It’s Brody, a transplanted NYC cop, Quint, an Englishman, and well, ok
we never find out where Hooper is from.
But still Brody is the one that throws the oxygen tank into Jaws’ mouth
and also shoots it to blow that beast to smithereens. Really the islanders are relegated to
background characters, idiots and lunch.
To add even further insult to New Englanders no islander has
the trademark Bostonian accent. Instead they
all speak with a New York inflection for some reason.
Alright with that out of the way let’s check out that
sequel. Oh the goddamn inevitable
sequel.
For number two here the filmmakers treated the material much
more like a slasher picture. This is
kinda interesting because this came out the same year as Halloween (1978) which is commonly agreed to have started the subgenre
proper (you had precursors like Psycho,
Black Christmas and a bunch of
Italian horror but everyone and their mother wanted to make a Halloween knock off after it grossed big
bucks). The focus is switched from
adults to teens, Brody’s son in particular.
The promiscuous kiddies drink, disobey their parents and at least hint
at having sex, which cannot go unpunished so they become the main targets.
Plot-wise you got a lot of the same shit. There’s a new shark in town (not Jaws, that
was the first one; I refuse to call this one Jaws so instead I’m going to use: the
shark) and he’s itching to try out the local cuisine. Brody knows immediately they’ve got another
situation on their hands but of course no one believes him, or wants to believe
him. In fact they sack his ass because
he’s ranting and raving like a lunatic.
Brody and the shark eventually have a showdown and the shark dies. The end.
This time the townspeople have every right not to believe
Brody when he lays the shark shit on them again. He doesn’t have any solid proof or witnesses
that he can produce. It’s supposed to
seem sad when Brody loses his job but it’s weird that he still works in Amity
as the chief of police in the first place.
After the horrific events of the first film you know that had to have
turned into one awkward ass town to stay in.
Everyone giving you weird looks and murmuring behind your back about
that one summer (remember, no one who lives in Amity actually saw the shit that
went down in the last half hour of the first movie; it must’ve sounded like an absurdly
exaggerated account when Brody and Hooper laid it all out). I don’t blame the townspeople for what they
do to Brody in part 2 but fuck ‘em, he’ll do better somewhere near less water.
Probably the strangest thing in the movie is when Body places
cyanide on the tips of his bullets and then melts wax over the poison to encase
it. This is fairly early on in the
picture after the shark eats a water skier and the lady driving the boat. What makes this attack so funny is the shark
is thrusting and jumping at the boat at full force like in the finale of the
first installment which looks ridiculous.
There’s no build up to it. The
filmmakers wanted to hit you hard towards the beginning and leave themselves no
place to go. Anyway the broad in the
motorboat panics and grabs a canister of gasoline to presumably throw at the
shark but ends up clumsily soaking herself. She then proceeds to shoot a fucking flare gun
in the boat causing everything to go on fire (shark included) and the entire
boat blows up (shark’s ok though). So
there’s no evidence of a shark attack left behind, just an exploded boat. For this Brody must lace his bullets with
cyanide. You could say he gets a little
paranoid.
Even Brody knows that infamous unmissable yellow barrel
from
the first installment doesn’t make sense being there
There are a lot of callbacks to the original like the
surprise reveal of a corpse in the water, “wanna fool around?”, one of Quint’s
yellow barrels is a planter outside the Brodys’ home, young girl gets googly
eyed boy to come to the beach, Brody gets drunk, a false alarm where everyone
evacuates the water in a frenzy, Brody brings on an expert to help him
understand what’s going on (although this character only lasts one scene), the
Orca makes a cameo and etc.
One of the biggest problems is the pacing. It starts off fine but then there’s a forty
five minute stretch without a shark attack (not counting the false alarm). And at that point there’s only a partial
attack where it’s unclear if the victim got bit at all. When he’s brought out of the water (still
alive by the way) then we can see that he’s bleeding but the scene wasn’t done
properly to convey that this guy got hurt.
So really it’s fifty minutes until the shark starts murdering folks
again. And the pace suddenly kicks up during
the last half hour when the shark goes after people left and right. It’s too uneven and the long shark-less part
in the middle leaves you scratching your head.
Michael, Brody’s son, is another mystery. He was supposed to have been traumatized from
seeing a man eaten alive by a 25 foot shark and barely dodging the same fate
himself in the first film. But here all
he wants to do is go sailing and hang out at the beach as if nothing had
happened. You’re saying he got over that
unforgettable episode? Sure it’s
possible but that’s a hard severed leg to swallow my friends. To see the Brody boys so antsy to get in the
water doesn’t add up for me. But then
again nothing adds up.
I mean this is just dumb.
It’s a dumb fuckin’ movie. You
know how McClane says “how can the same shit happen to the same guy twice” in Die Hard 2? Jaws 2
takes that one step further by having the same shit happen to the same guy in the same location twice. What is it about Amity that attracts vicious mammoth
goddamn sharks? At this point it really
kind of is supernatural like how Freddy always preys on kids on Elm Street or
Michael Myers always goes after teens in Haddonfield. Great white sharks are always in Amity, that’s
just the way it is.
The only angle that’s kinda cool is Brody going legitimately
crazy. But they play it cheesy where he
turns out to be the sole person right about a killer shark on the loose. They could’ve gone in a very different
direction with a film about Brody not being able to cope with his job, life and
the ocean at large. No actual shark,
only a haunted past and a fraught present.
But who the fuck is going to wanna see that shit? I’m not saying they should’ve done that but
it would’ve been way more fascinating than a half assed slasher picture.
Even the ending with the shark taking down a fucking
helicopter is so stupid and makes the animal look too smart. Like when the teenagers are forced to cobble
together their sailboats after the shark destroys most of their crafts it feels
like the fuckin’ thing plotted it all out.
But it didn’t look too damn smart when it bit into that electrical cable
frying it to kingdom come with smoke pouring out of its eye sockets. It’s a spectacularly silly demise that admittedly
I did enjoy a little.
And that one attack where the beauty queen’s boyfriend gets
dragged towards their boat slamming right into it is a well done scene. It has a grittiness to it that the rest of
the movie lacks.
Ok and the John Williams score is good too. It’s certainly not as memorable as the
original but there are nice moments and they make use of the iconic theme. Hey, even a half-baked John Williams score is
still pretty great.
So there you have it internet, Jaws 2. I remember it not
being very good when I first saw it a very long time ago but this is worse than
I remembered. It’s so thoughtless. Look guys, there’s Jaws and then fuck everything else.