Mad Ron's Prevues From Hell

Trailers are a class unto themselves.  There’s an art to making one and it sounds harder (on paper at least) than cutting together the actual film it’s representing.  Now I’ve never put one together so I’m just speculating but you need to find some of the best moments (and even some dull ones to use as filler), string them together in an exciting way, decide what you want to disclose and keep secret from the audience, set it to music, insert title cards, etc.  It’s gotta be hard to make the movie seem enticing and convey basic plot elements while avoiding making the whole thing seem like a total mess of scenes reedited in a chaotic and incoherent manner.  Plus this piece needs to be like two minutes or less.  Maybe someone can enlighten me.  Is this shit easy or difficult?

Anyway if you’re a trailer buff then you’ll enjoy this compilation of horror pictures from the 60’s and 70’s.  Some I knew about, a couple I’ve seen (just the really popular ones like Texas Chainsaw Massacre, Night of the Living Dead, Last House on the Left and Black Christmas (although here it’s called Silent Night Evil Night)) but most I’ve never heard of before.  A bunch have the ol’ “just remember it’s only a movie” or “we can’t show you scenes from this film because it’s too horrific” gag.  They do seem to get a little crazier as the collection progresses and they’re all good fun to watch.  None made me want to check out the pictures I hadn’t seen though.  I like to think I know better than that.  A few may be decent but it’s a long shot that there’s a hidden gem.  When it comes to horror movies in the era covered here nine times out of ten the trailer is better than the feature itself.

At the beginning, the end and every so often we’re given a break with ventriloquist Nick and his zombie dummy Happy.  Nick isn’t the best at speaking with his mouth closed as Happy’s voice sounds muffled most of the time and he seems to have particular trouble with the letter f.  Oh and they’re not funny.  Cheesy bad jokes and lame banter abound.  But I get why the filmmakers wanted to have wrap arounds because seeing all these trailers is kinda like eating a bowl full of Lucky Charms marshmallows that you picked out from the other tan crap that nobody likes to eat.  It sounds like a good idea but it quickly becomes apparent that what you’re eating is too sweet and a bit gross.  You need that filler shit made from oats to balance things out and make the meal satisfying.  Just watching trailers that show nothing but action and the best bits is exhausting and pretty saccharine.  So I agree with having breaks, however it’s unfortunate that the non-trailer parts are not very well written, staged or shot.

I recommend this though.  If you dig the idea of nothing but trailers, especially horror ones which make for the best viewing in my opinion, this works well enough.