K2

K2 is the second tallest mountain on Earth and it’s also one of the most dangerous to climb.  In fact depending on the stats you look at it is the most treacherous thing to attempt to ascend…or rather descend.  According to the well respected statistician Xavier Eguskitza: “If we consider the number of deaths coming down from the summit, K2 is by far the most dangerous, about 3 times more so than Annapurna. The problem on K2 is that if you reach the top, your chances of returning are significantly reduced” (K2climb.net, just giving credit where credit is due).  Shit man it sounds like that mountain is playing dirty.  It may not be the tallest one out there and only like the third most dangerous thing to climb (‘cause who cares about second and third place finishers?) but if you make it to the top there’s a really good chance that you won’t come down alive.  It’s like the mountain is saying, “ok, I’ll let you see my summit but then I’m gonna have to kill you.”  That’s not cool, fuck you K2.

So it’s ironic that a movie called K2 is actually about the Kansas highway where they show how it’s all fucked up and lawless with supercharged cars pimped to the hilt with guns and spikes ‘n shit like Mad Max or something.  Nah, I’m just kidding it’s totally about the second tallest thing on the planet.

Michael Biehn (Bereavement, The Abyss) is Taylor, a hotshot climber, lawyer and ladies man.  We know he’s hot for the chicks because he scales an apartment building, like he’s climbing a mountain, to get to some.  Anyway, he nags this billionaire (Raymond J. Barry (Rapid Fire, Falling Down)) to take him and his bff Harold (Matt Craven (Crimson Tide, Jacob’s Ladder)) on his expedition to K2.  Barry refuses at first but after a friendly reminder from Taylor that he saved his life once he concedes.

Harold is less experienced than Taylor but definitely has a passion for climbing.  He would probably do it a lot more and be on par with Taylor if his wife didn’t stand in his way.  She comes off as a cold person but really she’s just worried that he won’t come back one day from one of his trips.  You can tell that Harold loves her and reassures her that he’s not going to die and that this K2 expedition is a once in a lifetime opportunity, etc.  So after that scene you know some shit’s gonna go down.  It’s always the guy that’s totally in love and happy with his life that runs into trouble. 

As for the rest of the picture there isn’t a whole lot to tell.  They go to K2 and attempt to climb it.  

There isn’t a lot of action with people falling off the mountain or avalanches or anything.  Well I mean some of that happens but there aren’t any explosions or fist fights.  For the most part it’s a serious mountain climbing movie with some cheesy Hollywood type stuff thrown in for good measure.  Like there’s another pretentious climber in the group that Taylor clashes with and the Sherpas (although here they’re called porters) are afraid of the mountain and run away when they get near it.  Shit like that.

Recently I saw the IMAX film Everest and I think it was a good introduction to this picture.  K2 sorta seemed like the fictionalized version of what would happen in that movie (the events in Everest occurred 5 years later).  Some of the same shit happens in both including people getting killed.  So with that foundation of knowledge K2 seems like a pretty realistic and accurate portrayal of high altitude mountain climbing.

Now for some other things that I noticed:

1. The soundtrack is fucking great with a wailing guitar solo over a droning synth.  Unfortunately (or fortunately, depending on how you feel about this kind of thing) there was a different soundtrack put together by Hans Zimmer for the UK release that lacks the wanking guitar.

2. The reveal shot of K2 is sorta underwhelming.  It’s hidden too much behind clouds and doesn’t have the impact I’m sure they were going for.  There are other shots of it later that are beautiful which makes me wonder why they didn’t use one of those.

3. Michael Biehn’s haircut makes him not look like Michael Biehn.  Once you hear his voice you know it’s him but he looks different in this movie and I’m pretty sure the haircut is the reason.

4. This one has a spoiler in it.  Whatever mountain they used as the stand in for when they reach the summit of K2 looks pretty goddamn spectacular.  The view is gorgeous.  I wonder how hard that one was to climb.

5. Taylor calls Harold “H” for most of the film which I’ve never heard before and it sounds kinda funny (strange) to me.

6. Isn’t it ironic that the second tallest mountain is called K2?  Like, it has its rank right in the name.  After doing a quick check it’s not because of its status among mountains but rather the locals didn’t have a name for it and K2 is just what some geological survey guy sketched down one day when he observed two prominent peaks in the range (K1 had a local name already).  Apparently it also goes by the name Savage Mountain which is something I can get behind.  But K2 does sound badass.  It’s like it’s a synthetic robot mountain and not something natural.

7. This movie was based on a play of the same name.  They must have changed things quite a bit when they brought it to the silver screen because this piece doesn’t feel like a play at all.  Man, that sounds like a helluva challenge to put on a play about mountain climbing.  I’m usually not one for plays but I’d be curious to see how this would be pulled off.

That's a really cool shot for the poster.

As corny as it can be at times I think this is a pretty cool movie overall.  Aside from the stunning photography of the mountain and surrounding area it was really the last half hour that got to me.  I actually didn’t have a whole lot of interest up until that point but things get fucking dire real quick.  It had me on the edge of my seat wondering what would happen to these people.  I guess I didn’t realize that I liked these characters and was surprised to find myself caring about them as much as I did.

Even if you’re not a climber (I’m not) this type of extreme activity is interesting for the simple fact that there’s a high portability that you’re gonna die if you attempt it.  That’s the main reason why I haven’t tried my hand at Everest or any mountain for that matter.  

This one isn’t as good as Cliffhanger (especially if you’re looking for Michael Rooker who is not in K2) or The Eiger Sanction (it’s fuckin’ Clint Eastwood as a fuckin’ secret agent hit man) but it’s way better than Vertical Limit (from what I can remember that movie was total shit but it’s been a while).